For most of my life, I thought successful people just worked harder than everyone else. More hours, more hustle, more everything.

But here’s what I discovered: I had it completely backwards. The most successful people I know aren’t doing more—they’re doing less of the things that keep most of us stuck.

After years of studying high achievers and comparing them to those who struggle to break through, I noticed something fascinating. The habits we think will make us successful are often the exact ones holding us back.

Let me share what I’ve learned about the seven habits that successful people abandon while the rest of us cling to them like life rafts.

1. Needing everyone to like them

Remember that coworker who agreed to every request, stayed late to help everyone else, and still somehow never got promoted? That used to be me.

I spent years bending over backwards trying to please everyone around me. Every decision was filtered through the lens of “what will they think?” It was exhausting, and worse—it wasn’t working.

Then I started noticing something about the people who were actually getting ahead. They weren’t universally loved. Some people thought they were too direct, too focused, or too selective with their time.

Jodie Cook puts it perfectly: “Successful people are fully aware of what’s stealing their time and have no qualms about saying no to those things.”

That includes saying no to people-pleasing. Once I stopped trying to be everyone’s favorite person and started focusing on being effective, everything changed. My work improved, my stress decreased, and ironically, I earned more genuine respect.

2. Perfectionism disguised as “high standards”

We tell ourselves we’re just being thorough, that we care about quality. But let’s be honest—most perfectionism is just fear wearing a fancy costume.

I used to spend hours tweaking articles that were already good enough. I’d rewrite emails three times before hitting send. I’d delay launching projects because they weren’t “quite right” yet.

Meanwhile, the successful people around me were shipping imperfect work and iterating as they went. They understood something I didn’t: done is better than perfect, especially when perfect never actually arrives.

In my book Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego, I explore how Buddhist philosophy teaches us to embrace impermanence and imperfection. Everything is constantly changing anyway, so why pretend we can create something permanently perfect?

The shift from perfectionist to pragmatist was uncomfortable at first. But it freed up so much mental energy that I could actually focus on what mattered.

3. Constantly comparing themselves to others

Social media has turned comparison into a full-time job, hasn’t it?

I remember scrolling through LinkedIn one night, seeing all these “30 under 30” lists and feeling like a complete failure. Here I was, well past 30, still figuring things out while everyone else seemed to have their life together.

But successful people? They’re too busy running their own race to watch everyone else’s.

They understand that comparison is a creativity killer. When you’re constantly looking sideways, you can’t move forward. They measure progress against their past selves, not against carefully curated highlight reels of strangers.

Once I deleted most social apps and started tracking my own growth instead of everyone else’s, my productivity skyrocketed. Funny how that works.

4. Staying in their comfort zone

Here’s something nobody tells you: your comfort zone isn’t actually that comfortable. It’s just familiar.

I spent years in a warehouse job, shifting TVs. It wasn’t fulfilling, but it was safe. Predictable. I knew exactly what each day would bring.

Serial entrepreneur, Deep Patel notes that “Successful people are rarely bored, because they are always exploring something new.”

That’s the key difference. While average performers cling to the familiar, successful people actively seek discomfort. They know that growth lives on the other side of fear.

Starting Hack Spirit meant leaving that safe warehouse job. It meant facing rejection, criticism, and the very real possibility of failure. But it also meant finally doing something that mattered to me.

5. Multi-tasking their way through life

We’ve been sold this myth that multi-tasking makes us more productive. Plot twist: it doesn’t.

I used to pride myself on juggling multiple projects at once. Email open while writing, phone buzzing with notifications, three different tasks half-finished on my desk. I felt busy, which I mistook for being productive.

Then I started paying attention to truly successful people. They were almost militant about single-tasking. One thing at a time, full focus, no distractions.

The science backs this up too. Our brains aren’t wired for multi-tasking—we’re just rapidly switching between tasks, losing efficiency with each switch.

Now I work in focused blocks. Phone on airplane mode, notifications off, one task until completion. I get more done in two focused hours than I used to accomplish in an entire scattered day.

6. Avoiding difficult conversations

Confrontation used to make me physically uncomfortable. I’d rather suffer in silence than have an awkward conversation.

But here’s what I’ve learned: successful people don’t avoid difficult conversations—they seek them out. They know that unaddressed issues are like compound interest, growing bigger and more problematic over time.

Whether it’s giving honest feedback, negotiating a raise, or ending a relationship that’s run its course, they tackle it head-on. The temporary discomfort is worth the long-term clarity.

Once I started having the conversations I’d been avoiding, problems that had plagued me for months resolved in minutes. Who knew?

7. Waiting for the “perfect moment”

If there’s one habit that separates successful people from everyone else, it’s this: they don’t wait for permission or the perfect moment to start.

Deep Patel has also observed that “Successful people are constantly striving toward something.”

Notice he didn’t say “planning to strive” or “waiting to strive.” They’re actively moving, even when conditions aren’t ideal.

I waited years to start writing seriously because I didn’t feel qualified enough, experienced enough, or ready enough. Meanwhile, people with half my knowledge but twice my courage were building successful platforms.

The perfect moment is a myth. There will always be reasons to wait—not enough money, time, experience, or certainty. Successful people start anyway and figure it out as they go.

Final words

Looking back, I wish I’d understood these distinctions earlier. But maybe it was exactly when I needed to learn them—after enough life experience to recognize the patterns but with enough time left to change course.

The truth is, success isn’t about adding more habits to your routine. It’s about having the courage to let go of the ones that feel safe but keep you small.

Which of these habits are you ready to release? Because on the other side of that release is the person you’re meant to become.